It's far better to give

About a month ago, DH organized a service project with our small group.  We put together care packages for the homeless.  The packages were meant to be kept in our cars so that we could give them out as needed to people we saw as we were driving.  We all helped pitch in and bought different things to add to the packages - reusable shopping bags were filled with non-perishable food items, water bottles, new socks, toothbrushes, tubes of toothpaste, bar soaps, rain ponchos, and copies of the New Testament.  We also wrote small notes of encouragement and the kids in our group drew pictures to add to the packages.

The project was a great success!  I gave out my last bag today on my way home from a session in the city.  He was a young guy with an easy smile and was very graceful.  I wish I had asked what his name was so I could pray for him by name, but I know God will know who I am mean :-)  I went to the store today to buy more supplies for more bags and filled them up.  I also had a pretty adorable little helper!

I wanted to share this post because I know I typically post about adoption-related stuff.  And although there are way too many orphans in the world that need to be cared for, there are also people in need right here in our city too.  This is a simple, but needed way to serve and I love having these care packages on hand.  I thought some of you might also like the idea and want to do it too, so I'm passing it on.  And if you think about it, please pray for the man I ran into today the next time you're talking to God :-)

For I was hungry and you gave me no food, I was thirsty and you gave me nothing to drink, I was a stranger and you did not welcome me, naked and you did not give me clothing, sick and in prison and you did not visit me.  Then they also will answer, 'Lord, when was it that we saw you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or naked or sick or in prison, and did not take care of you? Then he will answer the, 'Truly I say to you, just as you did not do it to one of the least of these, you did not do it to me.'  Matthew 25:43-45

I'm going to MEXICO!

Yup, that's right! Ever since we brought our little love home from China, I have been praying about a Mission Trip. I always kind of thought it would be in China or Africa to love on some orphans but God had different plans. I think He must get a good chuckle out of me up there in Heaven, because He is always changing what I think my plans are. LOL. Truthfully, I'm not really sure why I plan anything at all.

So I leave in June for a 10-day Mission Trip to Southern Mexico with a group from church (there are 11 of us total) - we'll be working with villages to help establish churches. We'll be doing a lot of VBS ... so I get the privilege of lovin' on some kiddos, yay! And we'll be doing some fixing up in church buildings and village communities where needed. I am thrilled to be able to serve this way and ohhhh I cannot wait to document it all through my lens. Yes, I am super-duper excited indeed. And I now wish I had taken Spanish instead of French in high school. LOL. Wonder how much I can learn under 4 months?

I don't have many details yet, but in the meantime will you please keep our travel group in your prayers?

These fun shots were a result of me and Sunshine home alone ... both of us in our pj's. LOL. I couldn't get the remote to work, so I popped the 50mm on the camera and handheld it as far away as I could get. Unfortunately at 50mm, I was still a little too close, and at f/1.8, I missed a lot of focus. I don't know if I got any frameables out of this, but I definitely got a few winners that will always remind us of this atypical night together :-)

If anyone serves me, he must follow me;

and where I am, there will my servant be also.

If anyone serves me, the Father will honor him.

John 12:26

Post-Christmas Thoughts

Now that all of the craziness of Christmas has slowed down, I've started to reflect a bit. Ok a lot. LOL. And I can admit that I am guilty of getting wrapped up in the consumerism of Christmas. I wish I could say that our Christmas celebration has always been about Jesus. I would be embarrassed now to even share pictures of a few of our early Christmases with kids. Even now, I have trouble suggesting ideas for our relatives about what to gift the kids because they. have. every. thing. EVERYTHING. Slowly though, over the last several years, DH and I have both come to realize how over-the-top it all is. Actually, I think it's fair to say that DH always thought I went overboard, so maybe I had to catch up to him first in my thinking ... and we are both now realizing that the smaller-scaled gifting version of what we do is still probably too much.

I don't want my kids growing up thinking that's what Christmas is ... just a day when they get to unwrap mounds of gifts that they may or may not play with. And frankly, I don't want to celebrate Christmas like that. It's expensive and stressful! I mean, the WHOLE POINT of Christmas is to celebrate our Savior's birth and what He sacrificed for us. We have added some traditions into our Christmas celebration to bring Jesus to the forefront ... we talk about Jesus' birthday quite a bit and do a few other things. But let's face it, the kids are still mostly excited about those gifts on Christmas morning. Regardless of whether they come from us, another family member, or that one gift from Santa ... that's the main excitement for them.

So how do I change that? For my kids? For my family? At least for the gift-giving part, we are going to implement The Story of 3 Gifts next year for the kids ... adopted (stolen) from my dear friend Kelly. For the first time this year, I read her post about how they "do" Christmas and I thought to myself, THAT is what we should be doing. Making the gifts *mean* something to the kids. Making them *think* about what Jesus did for us. I loved it and shared it with DH, and he loved it too. He even shared it with someone else after that. And now I'm sharing it with you. I'm excited about this change and am looking forward to working on a few other changes as well.

Watching the Advent Conspiracy video really opened my eyes as well. If you haven't viewed it yet, I encourage you to do so. I don't want to write anything about it because I think the video will do the talking. Maybe it will affect you in the way it did me and DH. We watched a version of it at church too and changed a (small) portion of our gift-giving this year to reflect what we saw.

This video got me to start thinking. My life is full of choices. I make small decisions every second of the day ... whether to get that cup of Starbucks (guilty!!), whether to buy the extra toy for my kids (guilty!!) ... or whether to buy that one extra thing on Amazon because it was free shipping (GUILTY!!!). Truly, I do not *need* most of the things I buy. I am so guilty of buying extra junk that I don't need. What if I stopped buying just a small portion of those non-essentials and put that money toward something GOOD? Wouldn't THAT be a true birthday gift for Jesus?

"Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also."

Matthew 6: 19-21

The "Rules"

I have been tossing around doing "Family Rules" for a little while now. I don't know why we never did Family Rules ... we just never did. LOL. I didn't really think much about it in the past. A few things got me thinking about it more recently though, so after talking with DH, we decided to go for it. There are lots of different examples out there in internet world ... so many talented and creative mamas to use as resources. I love THIS one ... and THIS one. I really preferred the decoupage look but wanted to keep things simple for the kids.

I felt that too many rules would be overwhelming for them. At right about that time, I listened to a sermon that our wonderful physical therapist let me borrow from her home church in Indiana. It was about discipline in a Christian home ... fascinating. The Pastor's family has 4 internationally adopted kids and had their fair share of behavior issues, so I was excited to hear what he had to say. I definitely wanted our new "rules" to have a Biblical basis but just wasn't sure exactly where to start.

He talked about a lot of different things, especially living as God would want you to live and applying Biblical principles for discipline, but one of the main ideas that stuck with me was that the 10 Commandments could basically be summed up in two "rules" if you needed to simplify them ...

1. Love God

2. Love Others

Brilliant. Two rules that totally summarize the 10 Commandments that my kids could actually memorize ... certainly not to take the place of eventually memorizing the 10 Commandments themselves, but a simple way to apply them as rules in our household. I also picked scripture that represented each "rule" to write below, and voila! New Family rules.

I chose Luke 10:27 for "Love God" - "And he answered, 'You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind.'" And then I chose John 13:34-35 for "Love Others" - "A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also must love one another. By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another."

I'm pretty happy with how this turned out ... it's far from perfect, but nothing in life is. LOL. I picked up an 11x14 canvas from A.C. Moore (on sale - it was only $3!). I first painted the canvas quickly with a leftover red matte paint, let it dry, and then mod podged scrapbook paper with the rules onto it (I used permanent marker to write them) ... I had already cut everything out and planned how I was going to arrange it before I mod podged, and then worked quickly. Once it was dry, I coated the top with another *thin* layer of mod podge. The scrapbook paper did bubble up and shift a bit ... and looking at the canvas straight on, I can see some of it is a little crooked. That's ok though, overall I'm thrilled with my results. I hung it right by the garage door as we come into the house, so we will see it often and it will be a constant reminder. I talked with the kids a bit about our new rules, but I want to work in other ways to make them part of our daily living, especially to correct behavior when needed ... still working on that part though :-)

Lovebug wanted to be included when I was shooting these pictures last week ... I am so in love with his precious little face! He just couldn't be any cuter and SWEETER! Such a sweet little guy. He always tries to do the right thing and loves being a big brother now too. He has fit into the role so well :-) And as is typical with younger siblings, Sunshine *adores* him.

We said yes

Six months ago, we said yes to this precious face ... this beautiful child of God that needed a family as much as we needed her. We said yes as God laid adoption on our hearts, we obeyed out of love because we knew it was what He wanted. With His strength alone, we said yes as we stepped completely out of our comfort zones and traveled halfway across the world to bring her home. It was probably the most difficult thing we have ever done ... leaving 2 of our kiddos behind to bring the 3rd home. But just as Jesus teaches that the shepherd leaves his 99 behind to go find the one missing sheep, so did we. Adoption is such a beautiful thing.

"And every single day, it is worth it, because adoption is God's heart. His word says, 'In love he predestined us to be adopted as his sons through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will' (Ephesians 1:5). He sets the lonely in families (see Psalm 68:6). The first word that appears when I look up adoption in the dictionary is 'acceptance.' God accepts me, adores me even, just as I am. And He wants me to accept those without families into my own. Adoption is the reason I can come before God's throne and beg Him for mercy, because He predestined me to be adopted as His child through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will - to the praise of His glorious grace." (excerpt from Katie Davis, "Kisses from Katie," p.72-73)

But adoption is hard. HARD. Anyone who tells you otherwise is not being honest with themselves. I read once that you cannot be in love with the idea of adoption to succeed, that you truly need to be in love with parenting instead. I think this is so true, but would also add that you need to be committed to God's heart for adoption. In the midst of the sleep deprivation and temper tantrums of the first couple months home, there were many times when I wondered if things would get better and return to some semblance of normal. We struggled a lot, but we had committed to love this precious child and we knew God would get us through. I prayed more than I ever had in my whole life ... I prayed hard ... mostly for patience, compassion and more grace. I also prayed with a thankful heart ... thankful that God brought Sunshine to our family and thankful that she was ours to love. During those tough times, I was always at peace with where we were because I *knew* that it was exactly where God wanted us. And I was also (and still am) incredibly thankful that God loves adoption. So much that He has adopted us into His own heavenly family. I sometimes wonder how much more difficult adoption is for God than us here on Earth, when we are the ones constantly turning away and being difficult to love.

And in fact, in some ways I was joyful that we were going through a rough time. Not because I enjoyed the difficulty of all the changes, but because it forced us to rely on God. Rely on Him completely. To get us through such a crazy time, a time in which we had absolutely no control. I mean, have you ever truly relied on God? 100%? Most of us don't ... we may think we do, but we don't. In today's society, we rely on ourselves for everything. So I was even more at peace knowing that not only were we exactly where we were supposed to be, but that we were also relying on God to bring us through it. It was just as much amazing as it was difficult. We said yes, obeyed, and were relying on God to make it all work. And He did.

I can say that with complete confidence today because we are 6 months down the road. Six months of saying "yes" to God's will for us. Six months of adopting, parenting and loving one of God's precious little children that we now have the honor of calling our own. We have not been perfect parents to her, probably not even close. We have made mistakes, lots of them I'm sure, but God loves us anyway. And we love her, unconditionally forever. I love her so much that sometimes I squeeze her a little too hard or hold her a little longer than she wants. The mother's heart God has grown in me for Sunshine is incredible, amazing, indescribable. I can say, 6 months later, that I am madly in love with this girl.

Life is still not "easy" ... having 3 kids is not "easy," biological or adopted. Among all of the normal stuff of life, we have thrown in multiple surgeries, more doctor's appointments than I can count, physical therapy and soon speech therapy and occupational therapy. I am a brand new "therapist" almost everyday, a job I wasn't prepared for. On top of that, we had to adapt to being a family of 5, all of us. We had to make decisions based on adoption attachment, not always knowing what the right answer was. All for one little girl. One precious baby girl that God called us to love. We have ignored our friends and family on many occasions, simply because we were so physically and emotionally drained. DH and I have not been out on a real date in 6 months (save the 2 times that we snuck out while my mom "babysat" after Sunshine was already asleep). If you knew our family pre-adoption, you would know that the no-date thing has been a very big change for us. But we still are so happy that we said "yes" ... yes to all of the craziness we now call our life. Yes to being the parents of 3 incredible, miraculous kids who teach us more about ourselves every day. Yes to our amazing God, who adopted us into His family and loves us unconditionally, no matter how much we do wrong and run away from Him.

I still am in awe, in some ways, that God trusted US to be responsible for Sunshine, here on Earth, in this life. That He trusted us enough to raise her, love her, train her, and send her out into the world. What an honor. What a privilege it is to be parents to all THREE of our children. I can't imagine having not followed God's calling for our lives. Sunshine's adoption has strengthened my faith immeasurably as I've had to rely on God alone. It has strengthened my entire family's understanding of what it means to be one of God's children. Angel and Lovebug have been changed and molded more than I thought possible, in the best way I could ever ask for. I think in the ultimate way, they have learned first hand, what God's love is all about.

So today, we celebrate Sunshine's 6-month Gotcha Day anniversary. But I also think we celebrate so much more ... we celebrate an amazing God who loves us so much that He sent His only Son to live a perfect life here on Earth, and then die for us, so that we may be adopted into His family and have eternal life. Whether it be adoption or another special calling, God has a plan for YOU. He has a plan for all of us. "'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the LORD, 'plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.'" (Jeremiah 29:11).

Happy 6-Month Gotcha Day, Sunshine, we love you to the moon and back!

Sunday Snapshot {Orphan Sunday}

While going through Angel's school work earlier this week, I came across this page in her workbook. I read through all of the blessings she had written down, deeply touched by each one ... these things that SHE feels are blessings in her life.

And then I saw it ...

The bottom left "rock" ... the blessing that has now become such an all-consuming, amazing part of my life. Of our life.

"aDoPtion"

I started to cry.

Almost 2 years ago when DH and I made the decision to adopt, I had no idea how far reaching that decision would be ... how much it would affect our kids in ways I didn't know possible. Sure, I thought about how awesome it would be to gain a daughter and sister.  How it would stretch the older two and ask them to give even more of themselves as they welcomed a third sibling. And I put a bit of thought into how it would strengthen them and how wonderful it would be to celebrate another culture in our home. But for some reason, I never thought about how THEY would feel that adoption was a blessing.

I was totally wrong. This "rock" that DH and I know to be a miraculous blessing is now seen as a blessing by our kids too. It's inspiring ... truly inspiring, to watch their faith develop.

When we chose to walk this path of adoption, it was unchartered territory but we *knew* it was where God wanted us to be. Angel and Lovebug happily supported the decision with "faith like a child," they didn't question it and were excited to bring their baby sister home. And now, not only do we have a new daughter and sister to love, adoption is a blessing to us all.

Today, I am so thankful for adoption and how it has changed our lives. Sunshine, we love you baby girl and are so excited to watch you blossom into the person God intends for you to be! I am also thankful for Orphan Sunday (see the short video below) - I hope & pray this day makes people more aware of just how many orphans there are in the world. WE CAN ALL MAKE A DIFFERENCE, PLEASE SHARE THE LOVE!

"I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you." John 14:18

Sunday Snapshot {So Loved}

I'm not even sure that words can do these portraits justice, so I'll keep it short and simple. Thank you to Jen, a special friend and talented photographer who went out of her way ... you have given us a gift that I will never be able to repay! I am so grateful for the time and energy that you took to create these memories for our new family of 5 ... I know it isn't easy to wrangle 3 kids and make everyone look amazing :-) These are priceless and will forever be a wonderful reminder of God's love for us.

"We love because He first loved us." 1 John 4:19

Sunday Snapshot {Child of God}

"But Jesus called them to him, saying, 'Let the children come to me, and do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of God. Truly, I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God like a child shall not enter it.'"

Luke 18:16-17

Today was a good day.

{Sunday Snapshot} Two Months

Two months ago, we officially adopted our Sunshine - June 7, 2011 - an amazing day that will forever be a part of our family history. Part of me truly feels like she has always been here, the other part of me still enjoys soaking up the newness of everything. I have grown in so many ways along this journey, as a parent and also in my faith. I still reflect back at everything that has happened (and look forward at everything that is still to come) and stand in complete awe of God's handiwork. Seriously, complete awe. If you could have seen what I saw through this, I guarantee you'd feel the same way about Him too. Truly miraculous ... no coincidences, just God. His love is overwhelming. To feel Him lay something on your heart and then watch that become a reality ... wow. To now see our beautiful family of 5 and not be able to imagine it any other way ... even more wow. To begin with a scared, timid and incredibly courageous baby girl, and now see a happy, well-adjusted, carefree daughter and little sister ... just overwhelming.

"God sets the lonely in families,

he leads out the prisoners with singing;

but the rebellious live in a sun-scorched land."

Psalm 68:6, NIV

And finally, here is our adoption movie:

Here's the direct youtube link if you need it: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HXcQduWxXlY

I fall more in love with this child of God every single day. Adoption has been one of the more difficult paths I have ever walked, but it's also been one of the most amazing and rewarding. The love, prayers and support that family, friends and total strangers have sent our way has been inspiring, overwhelming and truly humbling. The love that I now feel for this little girl is wondrous, and it just continues to grow ...